All things work together for good, to them that love God, and are called according to His purpose

I was thinking yesterday, about how all things work together for good in my life. God has promised me this.
Later in the day I was thinking about life. Different circumstances bring different emotions; emotions that sometimes I wish I didn't feel. My heart is so fickle, and so hypocritical. I have a tendency to beat myself up for things I've done/am doing wrong. God has been reminding me that I am only human, and I can only be righteous because of him. He also reminded me that whatever my emotions are at any given time, they can be changed for His glory.
That goes for everything! Whatever my thoughts, my ideas, my beliefs, my foundations, friends, habits, whatever anything is at any given time, for any amount of time, because my God is good, he will either change it, or give me the grace to change it for his glory and for my good! Wow!

One of the things I'm really needing to work on is beating myself up for things, and making/letting myself feel stupid for small things that I have a hard time controlling (for example, dyslexic mistakes in math), or even things like making a mistake when I'm playing the piano. Somehow I've trained my brain to automatically respond with a rather belittling, "Idiot!" when I mess up. As you can imagine that does NOT help me concentrate on doing better, or glorifying God through all my work. I don't exactly know how to go about fixing this problem, though.

On a happier note, I've been doing much better in devotions lately! I've been reading my Spanish Bible a lot. I'll pick it up, open up to a familiar passage like, a Psalm, or James, or something like that. I'll read one verse, try to understand it, and whip out my Spanish-English dictionary, and try and put all the pieces together. Once I have it all together then I will read the English, and it is phenomenal to see the meaning fall together. I absolutely love the Spanish language. I seriously want to go to Mexico for a few months. I'd like to be there long enough to become fluent in the language. =P

I wanted to go to a John Regier conference at my church this week. It should be good. (We're not going, though.) One of these days I'd love to get training to be a counselor. If I could get my R.N., training in counseling and learn a little child psychology to help me in my counseling, well, there we go. I can go be a nurse/piano teacher/counselor at an orphanage for the rest of my life. =P I don't know if that's really what God wants me to do or not, but it's a good dream. =)

-Loshie