I know now

There were so many things I didn't know before about Jesus. I wanted to trust him and love him, but I didn't know how. I prayed for faith, love, trust, hope, and I waited, I watched, I lived.
I asked him to reveal himself to me, and teach me who he was. I never knew that He would ask me to go through such painful experiences. I never knew how sweet he was. I never knew who he was, until then.

He took me through the storms, and he is leading me now through a rough trail. It has been discouraging, and it will be, and there has been so much frustration and misunderstanding. Through it all he has revealed himself to me. I didn't know before, how to lay my burdens down, how to heal, how to trust, how to love . I'm still learning, but I do know now what it is like to give my burdens to him and to have peace. I know what it is to hurt and bleed, and have my savior pick me up, and heal me. I know what it is to trust that even though I feel like he's making things worse, he's working it out for my good! I know what it is to love Jesus, and to love others like HE loves them.


This past weekend I went with my college and career group at church to NC. We went skiing. It was so much fun. It was the neatest thing though, how God worked things out for me to go, and how encouraging it was. Being able to step out of life for a little while, just to have fun and laugh, and forget about everything else, it was what I needed.

I know what it's like to serve a God who deeply loves me, and it's indescribable. I beg him to never let me leave him, and for him to never leave me. If he ever left,....but I know he will NEVER leave me or forsake me, and that is a promise that totally transcends my human understanding and ability. He's so beautiful.